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self-care

Reflections on 2020: The Longest Year

December 23, 2020 by Vanessa Whiteside Leave a Comment

When I think back on the last year, my first thought is “throw it out with the garbage!” It was not a year any of us want to repeat. Turning the page to better days sounds ideal, yet each day can be challenging. Listening to the news can feel like a weighted blanket of doom these days. For the sake of not sounding like a total Debbie Downer, there is an end to this madness eventually. I see the light at the end of the tunnel.

footprints

I don’t have the quick answer for how to manage stress during a pandemic. Many health and wellness articles give advice ranging from self-care routines to cocktail recipes and everything in between. The answer is somewhere in there. For me, I’ve taken it day by day and sometimes hour by hour, and what I’ve learned is that 2020 required me to get quiet and listen to my thoughts. To hear the good, the bad, and the sometimes noisy ones. It’s been a process, but what I’ve learned during this time has been immeasurable.

A few reflections:

A BUSY DAY SPEEDS UP THE HOURS

I was already a person who woke up before the sun and made a to-do list for the day. When we received stay-at-home recommendations, I saw it as an opportunity to tackle tasks. Of course there were moments of boredom, but I occupied my time staying happily busy. I grew a garden, cooked new recipes, and even went as far as chalking the neighborhood with positive messages. Staying busy sped up the hours.

QUIET EQUATES TO PRODUCTIVITY

Some people thrive in loud, buzzing work environments. I’m definitely not one of them. I write and strategize for a living and need to be able to hear myself think. When I’m in the zone and someone interrupts my stream of consciousness to talk about themselves, it halts my creativity. Last year, I had gone as far as using noise cancelling headphones at the office. Working remotely has been a blessing that I relish, and to be frank, my writing craft and productivity are better for it.

A GOOD NIGHT’S SLEEP IS KEY

Anything that I can’t seem to solve or that truly frustrates me is cured by a good night’s sleep. When my mood is exacerbated by the day’s news headlines about the pandemic or the economy, I’ve learned that it’s best just to get some rest and start fresh the next day. I admire people who say “never go to bed mad.” Clearly, they’ve never argued with me about something. Ha!

ALCOHOL IS LIKE A LOUD FRIEND AT A PARTY

I appreciate wine. I love craft beer. Somewhere along the way last year I began drinking too often. Alcohol helped me transition after work to the evening hours, joined me on the weekends, and well, for nearly most occasions. Like a fun friend you take with you as a guest to a party, alcohol eventually had too much fun and embarrassed me. Today, I’ve cut way back on my drinking and I’m better for it.

KINDNESS ENDURES

A tumultuous year of political differences, race riots, and economic downturn hurt a lot of people in 2020. Showing kindness to others was something I could do to make it a little bit better. From a simple act of donating to a charity to smiling through my mask at a stranger in a parking lot, I did what I could to be a nicer person. Because at the end of the day, it’s not what people say that you remember. It’s how they made you feel.

The year 2020 taught me to zero in on what it means to listen to my instincts and support my passions. To be a better version of me.

What have you learned about yourself in the last year? What lessons has 2020 taught you?

Filed Under: Lifestyle Tagged With: 2020, COVID-19, footprints, goals, health, life, life lessons, lifestyle, pandemic, productivity, reflection, self-care, sleep, wellness, work, year

7 Simple Reminders To Help You Live a More Delightful Life

February 2, 2019 by Vanessa Leave a Comment

Not all of our days feel delightful because of life’s demands and sometimes events take place that really try our emotions. But on average, it’s fair to say that most days are what we make them. My mission is to encourage you to make them a delightful as possible!

Getting the most out of my time on earth and living in the moment has been a goal of mine in the last several years. I hope that through this blog, my zest for life is contagious. You deserve to live your best life through delightful experiences with people, traveling to new places or simply adding actions to your day that thoughtfully and purposely add value.

To give you a jumpstart today, I’ve put together a short list of simple reminders to consider. How many of these experiences could positively affect you? Declare your life more delightful today. Think of the below checklist as a bucket list of sorts.

1. CAST AWAY YOUR CARES

Remember the last time someone asked you to join them on an adventure and you declined the invitation even though you could have joined them? Why did you choose that path? Instead of limiting your experiences because of your inhabitations or worries, take advantage of the opportunity to let someone else plan your experience. When your friends or loved ones invite you to travel, attend a local event or to a dinner party…SAY YES.

Casting away your cares means that you’re not overthinking the invitation but acknowledging that you’re trusting someone else to help make your life more delightful.

2. PUSH YOURSELF AND GO IT ALONE

On the flip side, sometimes you have to invite yourself to try a new experience when no one else is suggesting one for you. There are times when it seems like everyone is busy with life’s demands and they’re unavailable to you. That’s okay! Plan your own fun.

When was the last time you gave in to your desire to spoil yourself? It’s not selfish. It’s self-preservation. If you really want to see a blockbuster movie but no one is available to go with you, go alone. Feel like trying the new ramen restaurant in your city, but others don’t share your adventurous palette? Who cares! Get in your car and head to the restaurant. Push on.

3. CHANGE YOUR LOCATION

Life’s routines of taking care of a household and going to work can sometimes bring on the feeling of monotony, a feeling that my spirit tries to fight at every chance. Perhaps that’s why I’ve lived in more than one state and worked in many professions. Can you relate to wanting to change your location? What’s stopping you?

Your well-being is often dependent on thrusting your endorphins into overdrive. If you’ve got a serious case of wanderlust and need to travel to a new locale, seize the opportunity. Feeling less than yourself at work? If those feelings are a result of not fulfilling your career goals, then maybe changing where you work is just as important as the work you do. Change your location and you open up a world of possibilities.

4. HONOR YOUR CURIOSITY

There is real value in allowing yourself to find the answers to many of life’s questions. Have you ever wondered what it would be like to introduce yourself to someone who is obviously different than yourself? Have you always wanted to learn a new hobby or develop your career skill set? Sign up to take a class!

Honoring your curiosity keeps your brain active and helps you from just experiencing life as it comes along. What could you discover about yourself today?

5. SURROUND YOURSELF WITH YOUR FAVES

You know I’m a big fan of self-care and often that includes surrounding yourself with things that you love and people that you love to be around. When you cater to your desire to enjoy things (or people) that you know make you happy, you are fueling your spirit. Think of three of our favorites right now. Make strides to include them in your day.

6. IMMERSE YOURSELF

To truly take advantage of life, I believe you must be aware of all of your senses. For example, when I traveled to an award-winning art gallery last year, I let myself wander alone in their outdoor gardens. I smelled the fresh herbs, reached out for a fluttering butterfly, brushed up against towering botanicals, listened to the drip of a waterfall and captured it all on my camera to enjoy again later.

Try to remind yourself to be present in the moment and immerse yourself in the experience.

7. LIVE IN THE MOMENT

Sometimes it’s hard to turn off our busy thoughts. Like most people, I have to sometimes remind myself to live in the moment and not plan for the next one or think of something I want to say. It takes practice and awareness, but in time you can also train yourself to focus.

While this post is more of a reminder list than a to-do list, I know it will help you make the most out of your experience and live more delightfully. Let me know how you plan to seize the day by commenting below!

Filed Under: Lifestyle Tagged With: awareness, bucket list, choices, curiosity, delightful, experiences, learning, lifestyle, live, motivation, perspective, self-care, thoughts

5 Ways I Spoil Myself + Self-Care Tips for You

March 5, 2018 by Vanessa Leave a Comment

Sometimes you have to put yourself first.

Pampering yourself is necessary to regain perspective, to boost your confidence, and to hit the reset button now and then. If that means that you spoil yourself by splurging on a night out with friends or restocking your closet with a new wardrobe, then by all means – celebrate you!

I used to do nice things for myself only when I thought I deserved it. For example, if I passed a major college exam or got a raise at work, I would convince myself I had “earned” the right to do spoil myself. As I matured, I realized that self-preservation doesn’t mean I have to justify buying a new spring wardrobe or a vacation somewhere. Giving back to yourself is a part of self-care.

Is it time for you to pay it forward to yourself?

I bet you’re like me in that you give so much of yourself to work, family, and your household that you seldom give thought to yourself and how you’re feeling. Time constraints keep so many of us from giving back to ourselves. Check out 5 Ways I Spoil Myself below and I’ll bet you discover at least one way you to pamper yourself without spending a ton of time doing it!

  1. Birthday Meal. I always treat myself to a delicious lunch at one of my favorite restaurants on my birthday. Even if I have to dine alone, because all of my favorite people are stuck at work, I’ll dine on my city’s best nachos, fattoush salad, or pizza. In my twenties, I once filled an entire table at The Mad Greek in Lawrence, Kansas with a spread of Mediterranean  favorites including a cocktail on my birthday! Why? Because I was celebrating me!
  2. StitchFix. Life is too short for me to spend another minute hating myself for having to cut through crowds at the mall to find staple clothing items. Enter…StitchFix! Every month I receive my “fix” in the mail that includes five clothing or accessories to add to my closet. I’m like a kid on Christmas when the green and white box arrives with hand-selected items from my personal stylist. If I don’t like something, I simply mail it back. It’s great!
  3. Hair Color. The first time I had an Aveda stylist color my hair and give me a scalp massage at the shampoo bowl, I was hooked. I didn’t need to spend another minute contemplating hair color options in the drugstore aisle. Now my trusted stylist colors my hair and you can see the difference. The cost of paying a professional to color my hair leaves it feeling soft and looking healthy.
  4. Flowers. Ain’t nobody got time to wait for someone else to buy them flowers! Buy them for yourself! Every month I purchase a bouquet of marked down flowers to add to our home. It makes me happy to see bright colors across the room and that level happiness is worth $5 any day.
  5. Gourmet Food. You know me, I love yummy food. So it’s no surprise that I would spoil myself by throwing some fancy cheese or a few expensive condiments into my shopping cart. Why deny yourself sushi or fresh mozzarella? Just buy it every once in a while and relish in the satisfaction of your purchase while you devour it!

You deserve to walk around in this world a happier person even if it means going the extra mile to spoil yourself. I’m not suggesting you waste your next paycheck on all of your favorite things in the name of “self-care.” Instead, select one or two activities that bring you joy and add them into your life on a regular basis. You’ll feel more delightful overall!

 

Filed Under: DIY, Lifestyle Tagged With: Aveda, bouquet, cheese, Christmas, clothes, confidence, delightful, drugstore, fix, flowers, fresh flowers, gourmet, gourmet food, Greek, hair color, happy, Kansas, Lawrence, lunch, Mediterranean, mozzarella, pamper, personal stylist, preservation, self-care, shampoo, spoil, StitchFix, stylist, sushi

20 Ways to Be Kind to Yourself

January 8, 2018 by Vanessa Leave a Comment

So often I read articles about how to pay-it-forward and be kind to others, something you know I appreciate! However, we often neglect to be kind to ourselves. It’s like the airplane oxygen mask rule: put the oxygen mask on yourself first so that you can assist others. If we’re not healthy and not taking care of ourselves, then we can’t present the world the best version of ourself to aide others.

Why don’t we take time for ourselves?

It’s simple. We allow the world’s demands to distract us from turning the focus on ourselves. Of course, there are events in our lives that require us to act and live selflessly. That’s okay as long as we understand that life is a balance. At the end of the day, we are no good to anyone else if we have nothing left to give.

When I take time for myself to relax, to learn or to just be still — I’m a better person to those who I connect with in the world. So, when was the last time you took a hour to give back to yourself?

If you’re like me and often need a reminder to prioritize myself, here are 20 Ways to Be Kind to Yourself.

  1. Take a long shower or enjoy a hot bath. Relax.
  2. Prepare your favorite meal even if it’s not what others want to eat for dinner.
  3. Use your vacation days from work. Americans don’t use provided vacation days, according to Forbes. Learn why. 
  4. Subscribe to a delivery service like Stitch Fix or order your household supplies from Amazon. Give yourself a break from shopping!
  5. Go for the appetizer. You always turn down the restaurant server’s suggestion for a pre-meal bite. Stop denying yourself the queso!
  6. Upgrade your shoe game or wardrobe.
  7. Make an appointment for a massage or make-up application.
  8. Read a self-help book or an inspirational story.
  9. Meet a friend for lunch. Conversations with friends are a vital to understanding oneself.
  10. Buy yourself flowers or a nice bottle of wine.
  11. Meditate.
  12. Go to bed an hour early every night for a week.
  13. Eat a nourishing breakfast.
  14. Yoga. Downward dog anyone?
  15. Allow yourself free time for a hobby you’ve put on the back burner.
  16. Try an at-home facial.
  17. Gently rub your temples.
  18. Eliminate the feeling of being rushed in the morning before work. Pack your lunch the night before.
  19. Dedicate one evening every week to watching your favorite show or movie.
  20. Get a babysitter and take yourself on a date.

How have you taken time for yourself recently? Tell me in the comments section below!

 

Photo: Pixabay

Filed Under: Lifestyle Tagged With: care, health, inspire, kind, kindness, mental health, random act of kindness, self, self-care, self-help, wine, yoga

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Hello! I'm Vanessa. Welcome to One Delightful Life, a blog created to add more delight to your life with delicious recipes, travel destinations, and lifestyle improvement ideas. Thanks for exploring my blog!

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