lifestyle

Reflections on 2020: The Longest Year

December 23, 2020 by Vanessa Whiteside Leave a Comment

When I think back on the last year, my first thought is “throw it out with the garbage!” It was not a year any of us want to repeat. Turning the page to better days sounds ideal, yet each day can be challenging. Listening to the news can feel like a weighted blanket of doom these days. For the sake of not sounding like a total Debbie Downer, there is an end to this madness eventually. I see the light at the end of the tunnel.

I don’t have the quick answer for how to manage stress during a pandemic. Many health and wellness articles give advice ranging from self-care routines to cocktail recipes and everything in between. The answer is somewhere in there. For me, I’ve taken it day by day and sometimes hour by hour, and what I’ve learned is that 2020 required me to get quiet and listen to my thoughts. To hear the good, the bad, and the sometimes noisy ones. It’s been a process, but what I’ve learned during this time has been immeasurable.

A few reflections:

A BUSY DAY SPEEDS UP THE HOURS

I was already a person who woke up before the sun and made a to-do list for the day. When we received stay-at-home recommendations, I saw it as an opportunity to tackle tasks. Of course there were moments of boredom, but I occupied my time staying happily busy. I grew a garden, cooked new recipes, and even went as far as chalking the neighborhood with positive messages. Staying busy sped up the hours.

QUIET EQUATES TO PRODUCTIVITY

Some people thrive in loud, buzzing work environments. I’m definitely not one of them. I write and strategize for a living and need to be able to hear myself think. When I’m in the zone and someone interrupts my stream of consciousness to talk about themselves, it halts my creativity. Last year, I had gone as far as using noise cancelling headphones at the office. Working remotely has been a blessing that I relish, and to be frank, my writing craft and productivity are better for it.

A GOOD NIGHT’S SLEEP IS KEY

Anything that I can’t seem to solve or that truly frustrates me is cured by a good night’s sleep. When my mood is exacerbated by the day’s news headlines about the pandemic or the economy, I’ve learned that it’s best just to get some rest and start fresh the next day. I admire people who say “never go to bed mad.” Clearly, they’ve never argued with me about something. Ha!

ALCOHOL IS LIKE A LOUD FRIEND AT A PARTY

I appreciate wine. I love craft beer. Somewhere along the way last year I began drinking too often. Alcohol helped me transition after work to the evening hours, joined me on the weekends, and well, for nearly most occasions. Like a fun friend you take with you as a guest to a party, alcohol eventually had too much fun and embarrassed me. Today, I’ve cut way back on my drinking and I’m better for it.

KINDNESS ENDURES

A tumultuous year of political differences, race riots, and economic downturn hurt a lot of people in 2020. Showing kindness to others was something I could do to make it a little bit better. From a simple act of donating to a charity to smiling through my mask at a stranger in a parking lot, I did what I could to be a nicer person. Because at the end of the day, it’s not what people say that you remember. It’s how they made you feel.

The year 2020 taught me to zero in on what it means to listen to my instincts and support my passions. To be a better version of me.

What have you learned about yourself in the last year? What lessons has 2020 taught you?

7 Simple Reminders To Help You Live a More Delightful Life

February 2, 2019 by Vanessa Leave a Comment

Not all of our days feel delightful because of life’s demands and sometimes events take place that really try our emotions. But on average, it’s fair to say that most days are what we make them. My mission is to encourage you to make them a delightful as possible!

Getting the most out of my time on earth and living in the moment has been a goal of mine in the last several years. I hope that through this blog, my zest for life is contagious. You deserve to live your best life through delightful experiences with people, traveling to new places or simply adding actions to your day that thoughtfully and purposely add value.

To give you a jumpstart today, I’ve put together a short list of simple reminders to consider. How many of these experiences could positively affect you? Declare your life more delightful today. Think of the below checklist as a bucket list of sorts.

1. CAST AWAY YOUR CARES

Remember the last time someone asked you to join them on an adventure and you declined the invitation even though you could have joined them? Why did you choose that path? Instead of limiting your experiences because of your inhabitations or worries, take advantage of the opportunity to let someone else plan your experience. When your friends or loved ones invite you to travel, attend a local event or to a dinner party…SAY YES.

Casting away your cares means that you’re not overthinking the invitation but acknowledging that you’re trusting someone else to help make your life more delightful.

2. PUSH YOURSELF AND GO IT ALONE

On the flip side, sometimes you have to invite yourself to try a new experience when no one else is suggesting one for you. There are times when it seems like everyone is busy with life’s demands and they’re unavailable to you. That’s okay! Plan your own fun.

When was the last time you gave in to your desire to spoil yourself? It’s not selfish. It’s self-preservation. If you really want to see a blockbuster movie but no one is available to go with you, go alone. Feel like trying the new ramen restaurant in your city, but others don’t share your adventurous palette? Who cares! Get in your car and head to the restaurant. Push on.

3. CHANGE YOUR LOCATION

Life’s routines of taking care of a household and going to work can sometimes bring on the feeling of monotony, a feeling that my spirit tries to fight at every chance. Perhaps that’s why I’ve lived in more than one state and worked in many professions. Can you relate to wanting to change your location? What’s stopping you?

Your well-being is often dependent on thrusting your endorphins into overdrive. If you’ve got a serious case of wanderlust and need to travel to a new locale, seize the opportunity. Feeling less than yourself at work? If those feelings are a result of not fulfilling your career goals, then maybe changing where you work is just as important as the work you do. Change your location and you open up a world of possibilities.

4. HONOR YOUR CURIOSITY

There is real value in allowing yourself to find the answers to many of life’s questions. Have you ever wondered what it would be like to introduce yourself to someone who is obviously different than yourself? Have you always wanted to learn a new hobby or develop your career skill set? Sign up to take a class!

Honoring your curiosity keeps your brain active and helps you from just experiencing life as it comes along. What could you discover about yourself today?

5. SURROUND YOURSELF WITH YOUR FAVES

You know I’m a big fan of self-care and often that includes surrounding yourself with things that you love and people that you love to be around. When you cater to your desire to enjoy things (or people) that you know make you happy, you are fueling your spirit. Think of three of our favorites right now. Make strides to include them in your day.

6. IMMERSE YOURSELF

To truly take advantage of life, I believe you must be aware of all of your senses. For example, when I traveled to an award-winning art gallery last year, I let myself wander alone in their outdoor gardens. I smelled the fresh herbs, reached out for a fluttering butterfly, brushed up against towering botanicals, listened to the drip of a waterfall and captured it all on my camera to enjoy again later.

Try to remind yourself to be present in the moment and immerse yourself in the experience.

7. LIVE IN THE MOMENT

Sometimes it’s hard to turn off our busy thoughts. Like most people, I have to sometimes remind myself to live in the moment and not plan for the next one or think of something I want to say. It takes practice and awareness, but in time you can also train yourself to focus.

While this post is more of a reminder list than a to-do list, I know it will help you make the most out of your experience and live more delightfully. Let me know how you plan to seize the day by commenting below!

How to Enjoy Your Layover When You’re Stuck at the Airport

December 8, 2018 by Vanessa Leave a Comment

It’s happened to all of us. We’ve had a l-o-n-g layover at an airport and there was nothing we could do about it but sit it out. Your layover doesn’t have to be boring!

I’ve spent hours stuck in Detroit, Chicago, Atlanta, Minneapolis and many other airports long enough to know that if you follow the below recommendations, your time will fly by. In the meantime, enjoy yourself!

VISIT THE DUTY-FREE STORE

Let’s be clear. I’m not suggesting you spend a ton of money at the duty-free store. Instead, try on a new fragrance, volunteer for a make-up demonstration or men’s facial or try a sample of the gourmet chocolates they’re peddling. When you exit the store, you’ll feel refreshed (and smell divine!).

SHOP THE BOOKSTORE

Some bookstores are larger than others depending on the airport you’re visiting, but even the tiniest convenience store has entire shelves filled with reading material. I’ve spent up to 30 minutes or more just flipping through magazines and reading the latest headlines. Even better, purchase reading material to take back to your gate!

EAT LOCAL FOOD YOU’VE NEVER TRIED

You know the old saying, “When in Rome, do as the Romans do.” Stuck in New Orleans? Try crawfish. Spending hours in Chicago? Dine on a hotdog with a cold local beer to wash it down. Waiting in Atlanta? Eat the fried chicken.

TAKE IN THE ARTWORK

Even the crummiest airports make an effort to put up wall displays of locals artists’ work or historical timelines. I appreciate learning about the Detroit’s water fountains or Wichita’s aviation history.

PEOPLE WATCHING

Instead of just sitting at your gate seat mindlessly watching people as they pass, consider imagining their lives. Who are these people? Where might they be going? Why might they be acting that way? Imagine their stories. Take it to another level and play this “game” with someone you’re stuck at an airport with and you’ll find they’ve concocted a different story for each person.

CHEER UP CHALLENGE

Tired of sitting? Take a stroll through the major traffic areas of the airport with one goal – to smile at strangers. I coined the name of this activity after a layover in Chicago at Christmas time. I began to notice that people were stuck in their thoughts and their faces showed their emotions. They were stressed, bored or rushed. The goal of this activity is to smile at a stranger when you make eye contact with them. If they smile back, that’s one point for you (and a warm fuzzy for them!). If they don’t smile back, at least someone smiled at them. A total win-win.

USE YOUR AIRLINE CLUB PASS

If you have an airline club pass burning a hole in your pocket, use it! Even if you only have an hour or two to spend in the VIP Lounge, it’s worth it. Enjoy the complimentary food, drinks (grab a wine glass or beer!) and relax in plush chairs while you recharge your batteries….literally.

GET YOUR EXERCISE

After hours of sitting on a plane and at your gate, get your blood flowing by taking a long walk through the airport. Of course, you may have to wheel your carry-on bag behind you. Commit to walking the full length of the concourse and back without using the moving sidewalk because we all know that’s totally cheating.

MAKE A FRIEND

Not everyone is cranky at airports. Not all people are weirdos. I’ve met perfectly nice people from my hometown while sitting in airports in other states. Now, that’s a trip! Pun intended. See someone who needs to charge their phone and is looking for a station? Move over a seat and offer the charging portal next to you. Be nice. You’ll make an instant friend. It’s that simple.

50 Ways to Break Up the Monotony of Your Life: A List of New Experiences to Try

August 13, 2017 by Vanessa Leave a Comment

Recently I lost a close family member to cancer and during that time of grieving I was reminded how fleeting life can be and that I wanted to seize every moment moving forward. I vowed to try something new, to push myself to show up to life every day.

My life had become a routine of commuting to work, sitting in a cubicle, and then coming home and repeating the same evening activities almost daily. Do your work days all seem to be a blur and before you know it you’re waking up on Saturday uninspired? I can relate.

So, I promised myself that I would begin to incorporate new experiences into my day to break up the monotony, force my brain to fire off new circuits to positively impact my life and my health. Some days I wake up and already know what new experience I will have on that particular day and other days I refer to a bucket list of sorts saved in my phone notes. Either way, I’m having a blast learning about myself, firing up my brain, and sharing these experiences with others. I’m feeling rejuvenated and I’m showing up for life, a more delightful one.

You must live in the present, launch yourself on every wave, find your eternity in each moment. Fools stand on their island of opportunities and look toward another land. There is no other land; there is no other life but this.” – Henry David Thoreau

We only get one life and I plan to live mine to the fullest. The following list is made up of activities I recently experienced or that I hope to try soon. Not all of these experiences require much money or a lot of time required. Perhaps you would like to stretch the boundaries of your comfort zone and try one or all of them too?

Go to brunch with your parent at a restaurant you’ve never tried.
Drive a different route to work.
Call up a family member you haven’t spoken to in years (or that you only text on occasion) and ask them about their day.
Reach out to a co-worker or friend who works nearby and asked them to meet you for lunch.
Volunteer on a committee, for your church or kid’s school or for a neighborhood association.
Say yes when a friend invites you to travel to the lake, go camping or site-seeing outside of town. Better yet, ask them to go with you.
Eat local. Sip on a coffee at a local cafe or try the seasonal beer at a brewery.
Style your hair differently than you did yesterday.
Change up your fragrance. Wear new perfume or cologne.
Pull your bicycle out of the garage and take it for a spin around the neighborhood after dinner one evening.
Visit the library, walk over to a category of books that interest you and close your eyes. Run your hand across the shelf of books until you decide to stop. Remove whatever book your hand landed on and check it out to read it.
Introduce yourself to a stranger and make small talk.
Tour a neighborhood in your city that you never explore.
Smile and say hello to a stranger on the street. You might find you have something in common with them.
Don’t just sunbathe while at the lake or pool. Run and jump in the deep end with careless abandon. “Canonball!”
Desk yoga.
Paint and sip wine at an art studio.
Visit a festival and eat at a food truck. Ever try bbq nachos? Curry chicken?
Eat your lunch away from your workplace at a park.
Try an adult coloring book.
Learn new skills by taking a webinar.
Grab some friends and sign everyone up to try an escape room challenge.
Experience a local seasonal activity like riding in a horse drawn sled at Christmas, making s’mores with the Girl Scouts on National S’mores Day or grab a map and navigate a corn maze at a pumpkin patch.
Wear colored socks to work.
Pick up a new hobby that doesn’t involve using technology.
Create a date jar with ideas for date night fun. Draw a new idea from the jar this weekend.
Buy yourself flowers.
Travel anywhere you’ve never been before.
Throw a party that coincides with a random food holiday.
Follow a recipe for a food you normally buy. No churn vanilla ice cream anyone?
Visit a tourist attraction or museum in your own city.
Pick fruit in an orchard.
Point the car west and just drive.
Actually stop and talk to your neighbors when you see them outside.
Always go to the movie theater? Try a dramatic play production instead at a local theater.
Lasertag. Paintball. Water balloon fights.
Grow vegetables or purchase them from a local farmer instead of buying them from a store.
Walk through a toy store and buy a toy to assemble yourself like a puzzle or box of Legos.
Try a different way of exercising or use a different exercise machine at the gym.
Watch wildlife anywhere but in your own neighborhood.
Take a new car for a test drive.
Walk your friend or neighbor’s dog.
Host a potluck or food contest amongst friends at your home. Who can make the tastiest beef jerky, mac-n-cheese, or pizza?
Let a local artist or friend sketch your portrait.
Get a henna tattoo.
Celebrate your city or town’s birthday. Take in the sites and buy cupcakes to celebrate.
Try a Pinterest DIY project.
Listen to a different radio station all day long.
Take a tour of the city from the air.
Do anything counter to your normal routine and when a friend of family member makes a suggestion to do something you’re about to reject, say “yes!”

Have an idea of something I should try? Challenge me by leaving your idea in the comments section below!